Okay ladies, let's talk about something we all deal with but rarely discuss openly - our periods. And no, I'm not going to give you that clinical "menstruation is a natural process" speech (though yes, it is!).
Just yesterday, I had a patient - let's call her Lisa - who came in looking absolutely exhausted. "Dr. Martha," she sighed, "I've been using the same pads my mom bought me when I was 13. There must be better options, right?"
Raises hand in solidarity.
Let's Decode Some Terms First
Before we dive in, let's talk about those terms everyone throws around but you might feel paiseh asking about:
- PMS (Premenstrual Syndrome) - Those fun symptoms that show up 1-2 weeks before your period? That's PMS. It's caused by hormone changes that can affect your mood, body, and even your food cravings. And no, you're not being "dramatic" - these hormone changes are very real!
- PMDD (Premenstrual Dysphoric Disorder) - Think of this as PMS's more intense cousin. If your premenstrual symptoms are severe enough to disrupt your daily life, that's PMDD. It's less common than PMS but affects about 5-10% of women. And yes, it's a valid reason to see a doctor!
- Ovulation - This is when your ovary releases an egg, usually around day 14 of your cycle (though everyone's different!). Fun fact: this is why you might notice changes in your discharge or feel a bit sexier mid-cycle - your body is doing its thing!
- Amenorrhea - Missing periods for 3+ months? That's amenorrhea. Could be from stress, excessive exercise, or other health issues. Worth checking with a doctor if this happens.
- Dysmenorrhea - Fancy medical term for painful periods. Primary dysmenorrhea is regular period pain, while secondary dysmenorrhea is pain caused by conditions like endometriosis or fibroids.
Common Conditions You Should Know About
Let's talk about some conditions that might be affecting your period. If any of these sound familiar, please know you're not alone:
- PCOS (Polycystic Ovary Syndrome) - This common condition affects about 1 in 10 women. Signs include irregular periods, weight changes, acne, and sometimes excess facial hair. Many women have it but don't know - if your periods are super irregular, it's worth checking!
- Endometriosis - When tissue similar to your uterine lining grows outside where it should be. Causes killer period pain, sometimes pain during sex, and can affect fertility. No, this level of pain is NOT normal - don't let anyone tell you to "just deal with it."
- Fibroids - These are non-cancerous growths in your uterus. Super common in women over 30. They can cause heavy periods (like, changing-your-pad-every-hour heavy), cramping, and sometimes that "auntie belly" look. Treatable, so don't suffer in silence!
- Adenomyosis - Think of this as endometriosis's cousin - but instead of tissue growing outside your uterus, it grows into the uterine wall. Causes heavy, painful periods and that "something's not right" feeling. Often missed because many think severe period pain is normal (it's not!).
The Monthly Visitor We All Know
Let's be honest - periods can be a real pain (literally!). Between the cramps that feel like someone's wringing out your insides, the mood swings that have you crying at tissue paper commercials, and trying to hide your pad when walking to the office toilet... it's A LOT.
And can we talk about those nights when you're worried about leaking through your pajamas? (Been there, ruined those sheets!)
Look, our bodies are doing their thing every month, and sometimes it feels like they're doing it in the most dramatic way possible. You might be experiencing:
- Cramps that make you want to curl up in bed
- Mood swings that have your colleague asking "you okay or not?"
- That bloated feeling
What's Actually Going On Down There?
- where even your loose pants feel tight
- The dreaded PMS that turns you into a different person
And you know what? All of this is normal. Uncomfortable, yes. But normal.
Let's Talk About Better Options
Here's something I wish someone had told me years ago - you don't have to suffer through periods like your ah ma did. We've got options now!
- Menstrual Cups - I know, I know - they look a bit scary at first. But hear me out! Once you get the hang of them (yes, there's a learning curve), they're actually amazing. No more running to Watson's every month, and they're better for Mother Earth too.
- Period Panties - These are not your old-school granny panties! Modern period underwear is actually pretty sexy, and they work. Like, really work. No more putting a dark towel on your bed "just in case."
- Heating Pads - Ladies, if you haven't tried a good heating pad for cramps, you're missing out. It's like a warm hug for your angry uterus. We've got some really nice ones at PinkLifestyle that are discrete enough to use at the office.
- Organic Tampons - If you're a tampon user, switching to organic ones can make a huge difference. Less irritation, no nasty chemicals, and better for your body. Win-win!
Why Your Body Deserves Extra Care (Science Says So!)
Let's talk about why certain self-care practices actually work during your period:
Dark Chocolate Cravings
Ever wondered why you're dying for chocolate during your period? It's not just in your head! Dark chocolate:
- Contains magnesium which helps reduce cramps
- Boosts serotonin levels (your happy hormone)
- Has iron to help with period-related fatigue
- Contains antioxidants that fight inflammation
Why Period Leave Makes Sense
This isn't about being weak - it's biology:
- Your body temperature actually rises during menstruation
- Energy levels drop as your body uses more resources
- Pain from cramps can be as intense as a heart attack (studies have shown this!)
- Hormone changes affect cognitive function and focus
Specific Ways to Care for Yourself
Beyond the basics, here are some evidence-based ways to feel better:
- Eat iron-rich foods like spinach and red meat (yes, that beef noodles craving is your body being smart!)
- Try gentle yoga poses - child's pose and cat-cow can really help with cramps
- Use a hot water bottle AND cold compress - heat for cramps, cold for headaches
- Take magnesium supplements (check with your doctor first!)
- Massage your lower abdomen in clockwise circles with essential oils
- Time your pain meds right - take them BEFORE cramps get bad
Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM) Tips
Since we're in Singapore, let's talk about some TCM wisdom:
- Avoid cold drinks during your period (your ah ma was right!)
- Red dates tea can help with energy levels
- Ginger helps with blood circulation and cramps
- Keep your feet warm (those bedroom slippers are more important than you think!)
When Things Get Extra Tough
Sometimes periods are more than just uncomfortable - they're painful. Like, really painful. Especially if you're dealing with conditions like vaginismus (yeah, that's a whole other conversation we should have).
If you're experiencing:
- Pain that keeps you from daily activities
- Heavy bleeding that interferes with life
- Severe cramping that pain relievers don't touch
- Emotional symptoms that feel overwhelming
Please don't suffer in silence. Talk to a healthcare provider. It's not "just part of being a woman" - you deserve to feel better.
Taking Care of Yourself
You know what drives me nuts? How we're expected to just power through our periods like they're nothing. Need to take MC because of severe cramps? Somehow that feels less "valid" than having a flu.
Can we change this narrative?
Your period is a monthly reminder to take care of yourself. Whether that means:
- Trying new products that actually work for your body
- Taking time to rest when you need it
- Using that heating pad without feeling guilty
- Speaking up about your needs
Let's Keep Talking
Want to learn more about period products or other intimate health topics? Come chat with us at PinkLifestyle. We've got all these products and more importantly, we've got people who actually understand what you're going through.
And if talking face-to-face feels too much (totally get it!), slide into our WhatsApp. Sometimes it's easier to ask questions when you're comfortable in your PJs with a hot water bottle!
With understanding (and plenty of chocolate),
Dr. Martha
Resident Sexologist of PinkLifestyle.com
P.S. Got questions about vaginismus or other intimate health concerns? Check out my podcast "Eros Matters" - we talk about all the things your mom probably never told you about!
Dr. Martha Tara Lee is a Singaporean Chinese Relationship Counselor and Clinical Sexologist, renowned for her pioneering work in sexuality and relationship education. She holds a Doctorate in Human Sexuality, a Master’s in Counseling, a Master’s in Public Policy and Management, and a Bachelor’s in Communications. In 2009, she founded Eros Coaching to empower individuals and couples towards self-actualization and pleasure-filled lives. Dr. Lee has authored four books, including Love, Sex and Everything In-Between and Orgasmic Yoga: Masturbation, Meditation and Everything In-Between. She has been recognized as one of the Top 50 Inspiring Women under 40 by Her World in July 2010 and one of the Top 100 Inspiring Women by CozyCot in March 2011. Additionally, she hosts the weekly radio show Eros Matters.